Plain Vanilla

I found this in a forgotten folder on my computer:


too depressed to sleep, too depressed to work.
my blurred eyes are already hurt.

neuroses created, neuroses underground
full of these things, but can't make a sound.

trying today, can't find a way
to release these illusions,
they're here to stay.

my mind's hitting red-line
it's far from the ground.

even when it screams,
it won't make a sound.

but it continues to struggle,
not quite sure why.

too much trouble breathing
up here in the sky.

not much point in creating
never good enough

fuck all this nonsense
and the silly stuff.

people surrounding,
they never really care.

that every time I suck in,
there's too little air.

good times squashed
by too much nonsense

time spent with me
can be quite dense.

gaurd let down, and packed tight away
to be quickly returned 'cause of what people say.

don't want to care, but have no choice
will is too weak, just like my voice.

nothing at all



(actually that's not true. I have a lot to say right now, I'm either too lazy to put it down, or I'm afraid of what it might be.)

because I have nothing better to do.

while getting fat.

I've been mostly sitting and watching TV/fooling around online, I've also been sick which is why i've been land locked however I've also been in a funk lately so being sick probably didn't change much.


but whatever. New flash doodle. Alright baby....

this is what me and my math major buddies to when we don't want to be doing math.



I know.

amazing.

it revolved around a girl named alison.

according to her, she doesn't care about me enough anymore to be in a romantic relationsihp with me. I don't know what to do.

I think I'll create Noah's second flood with my tears.

god I wish I wasn't such a fucking pussy.

and brought his fellow guitar center employees plus some girls. All loud. at 3am. (last night was thursday)

So he left me a sorry note with a drawing, and I left him a note with a comic saying what I'd do if it happened again.


Here's my re-drawn and digitized version of the comic (arrows and text are substitutes for my poor drawing skills):

utterly.

and lonely.


this is the best I've got, and it sucks.

sometimes I can't help but feel like charlie brown.

I think I need a soundtrack. 

 I have trouble shaking the idea that everything bad happening in my or other peoples lives is 100% my fault, despite how untrue it may be.

I know I'm weird.  I wish I wasn't.  When it comes down to it though, I'm pretty sure I'm the cause of most bad things.

I was pretty depressed today too, until tyler and I got some food from a bad diner, and posted glossy book-drool face posters around haight street.  That was pretty fun.  I guess.

Now I feel empty again, and don't want to go back to school, or really see anyone for that matter.  I dunno, I'm not sure if I said this already, but I'm just weird.

really bad.

 

the neighbors are being loud again.  but I guess it's barely midnight, and it is a thursday night.

I noticed that one of them drives a new mustang coup.  It would be cool, but it's only a 6-banger.  I really can't respect anyone who drives a mustang that isn't at least a V-8.  The guy might as well have bought a Hoda Accord.  The fucking tool.


so here's a horrible attempt at a comic (sortta).

I dunno.

whatever.





Fin.

boredom.

and an utter lack of artistic talent.

 

is my prediction for how my day at school is going to go...

 

3:30am I'm woken up by some asshole ringing my neighbor's doorbell like he's trying to will the cross walk to turn green faster.  Neighbors are already loud, but I was asleep so it wasn't a thing.  After some yelling, door slamming, and muffled proclamations of what I think were "this is my house!!" answered by "I understand that." I finally decide to just wake the fuck up at 4:50.  They're still laughing and talking loud.  I thought about going down there with my louisville slugger (a relic from my little league days) but have settled for letting my sub-woofer pound on their ceiling via hip hop et al instead.

 ing with flash.

and my idiocy related to it.

so here's a whole lotta nothing...  I used to make weird shit like this all of the time, I'm not sure why I stopped.  Even though it always sucked, it was still fun to do.










dig.

I need a job so I can make money and spend it on glorious nights out/off.

I'm seeing things.

And hearing things.

Mostly ghosts.

these are pretty awesome, right?

(the photos/clogs, not the background)

Thom Yorke considers touring axe

http://www.ateaseweb.com/news/archive/2006/10/thom_yorke_cons.php

Thom Yorke has threatened to quit touring unless measures are introduced to halt the "ridiculous consumption of energy" involved.

Speaking to The Guardian yesterday, Thom vented his fury at the current state of modern-day touring whilst promoting a Friends of The Earth climate change campaign.

"I would consider refusing to tour on environmental grounds, if nothing started happening to change the way the touring operates," Yorke revealed.

"Some of our best ever shows have been in the US, but there's 80,000 people there and they've all been sitting in traffic jams for five or six hours with their engines running to get there, which is bollocks."

As for his own method of transport for reaching distant concert venues, Yorke said: "Long haul flights just feel wrong. I'm trying to figure out a way of getting to Japan by train. I quite fancy that Trans-Siberian whatsitsname but apparently it's a bit scary."

Thom Yorken will call on the government to make UK companies more accountable for their impacts on poor people and the global environment today, in an open letter to MPs in Tuesday’s Guardian.
The letter urges MPs to back amendments to the Companies Bill which would make companies accountable for their social and environmental impacts. The Bill is due to receive its third reading in the House of Commons this week.

The letter references cases concerning Tesco’s workers rights records on fruit farms in South Africa, as well as a recent ActionAid report which detailed alleged environmental and human rights abuses by a subsidiary of UK mining giant Anglo-American at their operation in Ghana.